By Kiné Corder, MA, NCC
There comes a time in every man’s life when money alone just isn’t enough. He will want to know that he is leaving a lasting legacy, that he has made a contribution and that he will be remembered for the good things he’s done, not the mistakes he’s made.
Some will call this a midlife crisis, but for a wealthy man, it’s really an existential crisis. When a man is in search of meaning over money, he will do things that others won’t understand. Each thing will have deep meaning to him, but could appear frivolous and silly to others, especially if they don’t know he’s experiencing his existential crisis.
I’ll explain what an existential crisis is, how it affects a wealthy man, and I’ll also introduce myself, so you know why I’m the authority on this subject. By the end of this article you will know how to navigate your existential crisis when it comes, as well as feel at the top of your game no matter where you are in the process.
I am Kiné Corder, National Certified Counselor and the World’s #1 Financial Hypnotherapist. You may remember me from Oprah or ABC’s Extreme Makeover Show. Since then, I’ve become a best-selling author and an international speaker taking the stage with well-known speakers like Les Brown and Daymond John.
I’m also the CEO of Presidential Lifestyle, a tech enabled, business and self-development company focused on prosperity. Presidential Lifestyle develops performance programs for CEOs who want to lead a higher producing, more productive, millennial team. Our mission at Presidential Lifestyle is to alleviate human suffering associated with money through widespread prosperity. We do that using our proven TAME YOUR BRAIN™ system.
Our focus is on taming your brain because research shows no matter how hard you try your brain will continue to do the same thing expecting a different result. You may have been told this is the definition of insanity… Well, let me tell you it’s the definition of humanity. We all do it. We all do the same things over and over until we have a life changing event. An existential crisis is that life changing event.
Whether you know it or not, you were programmed to believe certain things about money, love, health, the world, and even about yourself. That program didn’t come from you, it was given to you by society, and because you didn’t choose it, it’s causing you pain and suffering now. When a man is experiencing an existential crisis, he can no longer tolerate the pain and suffering the way he had in the past.
You have an idea of what prosperity means to you, but society tells you that it’s one cookie cutter thing. For years you’ve gone along with society’s version of success, only to feel like an imposter. Before I go further, I’m going to address the man who believes that he has been charting his own path. You haven’t. You rebel, break the rules mentality is still just a program. It’s a belief system you learned in order to navigate life.
A set of natural reactions your brain continues to have in an effort to feel safe. Even those risks you take make you feel safe, somehow. By the time you were 5 years old. You already knew how you wanted to relate to money, love, health, the world, and even yourself.
You knew if you were fat, skinny, poor, wealthy, smart, dumb, or any other adjective you can use to describe yourself. You also knew whether or not you wanted to be this way. You know if you accepted this about yourself or not. Deep down inside we are hurting because of society’s negative messages about us and who we are.
That’s what programming is. Messages that you’ve been fed over and over again that eventually become your destiny. The good news is, you can change it with time and repetition, a life changing event, or with hypnotherapy. You can shift the old program to a new program and for a wealthy man, that’s what happens during an existential crisis. He loses the “money is everything” program in exchange for more meaning.
So, what exactly is an existential crisis? It’s when you finally decide to break through the old program and shift to a way of life that’s more in line with your core values. It’s when your negative messages get an upgraded operating-system, and you call society out on its BS.
Think about the negative messages you’ve heard about money, love, health, the world, and even yourself. What messages did you hear? That’s your program. During an existential crisis, a man will buck this program. Not in an effort to show off, but in an effort to finally show up as his true authentic self.
But wait, this programming shedding process can be painful. Not just painful for him, but painful for the people around him. His wife will feel like she doesn’t know him, and she doesn’t. She’s been married to his imposter all these years. She could fall in love with him all over again, but she’s also programmed, so her natural response is to dislike him for changing. During his change if his friends haven’t hit their crisis yet they will envy him for being bold enough to be authentic. If they have experienced their shift, they will accept him into the club.
The man on the search for meaning over money will pat his way through the darkness until he finds his way out of the tunnel. His crisis will start with him going back to the last time he felt powerful and revert to his idea of prosperity at that age.
He might buy a Ferrari, dress younger, do things he always wanted to do, and he won’t care about disapproval. I’m not talking about that rebel attitude where he breaks all the rules for effect. I’m talking about not caring what others think about the authentic version of who he is. He will finally feel free.
You have overcome your existential crisis when you choose freedom over programming.
True freedom is the most peaceful, most powerful feeling a man can have. When the time comes for your existential crisis, and it could be happening right now, you will need to know 5 things. If you have clarity on these 5 things you will move through this experience with more ease.
The 5 things you will need to know are: know your mission/vision, know yourself, know your cause, know your laws, and know your pause. The 1st one is the most important so I will give you the tools you need to get clarity on your mission and vision. You can connect with me outside of this article to get all of them when you are ready.
To know your mission/vision you’ll need to ask yourself, “what is my idea of prosperity?” Not society’s version, but your own. What does the word prosperity mean to you? Allow yourself to see it in your mind’s eye. View it just like you were a kid imagining yourself going to space or becoming a superhero. Let your mind wander and receive the vision.
Get comfortable with it. Replay it over and over in your brain. When the negative messages come up in order to tame them, just say, “thank you for sharing, I don’t believe that anymore”. Let those negative thoughts roll right out of your head and replace them with what you really want. Replace them with beautiful thoughts of the legacy you will leave, the impact you will have, and the peace of mind these things will give you.
Let go of getting approval or getting attention, neither is serving you. Your idea of prosperity will include your wealth, health, adventure, love, and legacy ideas… it may not match up with society’s ideas, but I assure you, if it’s yours, it is right for you. Receive it. Accept it. There is no cookie cutter way to enjoy life. Each man has to go on his own search for meaning over money. On that search he will find that the journey to meaning is important, but the destination is even more important.
Since there is only so much 1 article can explain, if you’d like to know more about how to navigate an existential crisis or about performance enhancing programs for you and your team, I invite you to visit our website at Presidentiallifetyle.com to learn more.
You can also subscribe to the Money and Meaning podcast to get tools and resources. Follow me on LinkedIn for free weekly tips that make the search for meaning over money more enjoyable.
Your freedom and peace are inside of you, not in any material thing, not in any person, and not in any substance. When you experience your existential crisis and arrive at freedom with yourself you will feel the most powerful you’ve ever felt in your life. With this power comes the knowledge that “life is about more than money, it’s about meaning.”